How I Renewed Myself
I had heard about Alabastron in 2010 from a colleague who had attended the program, I didn’t give it much thought and I wasn’t interested in it then.
Early in the year 2014 I was having challenges relating to my family and I remember how strained my relationship with my mum has always been and I didn’t want to carry that into my relationship with my daughter or my husband.
I remember how strained my relationship with my mum has always been and I didn’t want to carry that into my relationship with my daughter or my husband.
It was during this season that I remembered about the Alabastron that Shiku used to talk so much about so I went for the season 23 open day and there was a lady talking about her strained relationship with her daughter and she even apologised for all the hurt she had caused her, I decided then to do the program and I joined in September.
During the classes it was indeed a journey of discovery for me, I learnt that I was blaming myself for so many things and I needed to forgive myself and forgive my past.
I was walking around with a feeling of not being good enough and this had made me into an impatient person and a perfectionist who believed no one is good enough and so I pushed to make everyone around me better to my own definition.
During the classes it was indeed a journey of discovery for me, I learnt that I was blaming myself for so many things and I needed to forgive myself and forgive my past.
This led to strained relationships in my family. I was also estranged from my dad, my parents had separated as a child and there was a lot of family drama surrounding that relationship so I hadn’t talked to him for 5 years.
Am I fully recovered, no this is a journey. I have to remind myself daily that I am beautiful and I am loved and now I have the tools to work out any issues I have and I have an endgame in mind, so I focus on the endgame. When you know where you are going, things that used to be such a big deal shrink back and I am learning to focus on the end game, my harvest, and my destiny.
And do you know which other relationship has greatly improved? My relationship with God,
My relationship with God has been renewed. I can let go now and have someone else take care of me, which is so liberating because I used to think I am the only one who can do that and I had closed people off.
I see him as my Dad now and I look at how my husband relates with our kids (I have an amazing husband by the way and it now feels like we are newly married) and I go to Him in the same way, I call him Baba and I laugh with Him and I tell Him when I am scared and I ask Him to hold me and it’s been amazing how my relationship with God has been renewed. I can let go now and have someone else take care of me, which is so liberating because I used to think I am the only one who can do that and I had closed people off.